Right Now!

In rotation... the sounds of GOD's creations. I feel blessed. Sometimes I have to fall to my knees and just be thankful for the love of GOD. As I sit under the light of my desk lamp I watch the shadow of my pen dance across the page. Inspiration comes from many different places... each time, each story brings something different, something genuine.

I do...

I love you
I love you
I love you

... I do. No exclamation points, or anything like that because it'll take away and limit how I feel. This isn't another poem, this is specifically to you. I don't want any metaphors, anecdotes or any other form of the English language to dilute what I'm trying to tell you. This isn't up for discussion either. I've been holding it in for 3 weeks now, wrestling with how I want to tell you, what will be a cool way to impress you with the delivery, and if I should even tell you at all. Normal occasions I wouldn't dare even think of insulting the weight in which these words hold by simply posting about it. I'd make sure I was face to face & just tell you whenever my heart said to tell you. But this time... this go 'round I can't. Well I can, but I won't. Because I love you I accept all that comes with that, including the sacrifices that must be made. So I won't. Unless my heart is as overwhelmed as when I 1st realized that I was in love with you. But even then I'll be discreet and make sure that I'm close, looking into your eyes and making sure that you know I'm talking to you and you only... then whisper it. I'll only whisper it because that's the only tone of voice that messages don't get diluted. Nothing is assumed by the tone, and the words spoken hold all the weight.

I'm not at all concerned about the feeling being reciprocated. I just need you to know how I feel. Without even knowing the taste of your lips, I know you have the best kiss. Everything in my day reminds me of you. Even when I try to force myself to think of something else, another thing that has nothing to do with us reminds me of you. I've consulted with GOD to make sure nothing of lust interfered... all things removed, I still love you. So when I tell you I love you, I'm doing it with an clear heart & mind.

I have no clue of how we're connected, if there's even a possibility of another lifetime or anything like that. And as intriguing as the possibilities sound, I don't care. I only know the woman that GOD has put in front of me, and I only know what I feel now. I love you. I'm in love with you. When did I know... that day we we're cooking in the kitchen. It was a little after we finished. I had returned to the couch... I happened to look up the same time you did and we shared a smile. It's surely not the 1st smile shared, but that was when I knew. Thought it was only fair you knew when, since I'm telling you how I feel.

BIG P.s. This is just for you to know. I don't expect any discussion, for the sake of making you feel awkward, or anything more than you just knowing. Of course if you want to I'm more than willing. I think you knew the other day that I was talking about you. THEN YOU GO AND DO SOMETHING GREAT & SWEET LIKE THAT, drawing me while I work. I've always wanted to draw or paint you. I think I may have asked you before... anyway this isn't one of those I love you, but I'm sad I can't have you type letters. NO, this is a I'm the happiest guy in the world because I do love you. No other sides to it. Just happy that you make me feel this way and happy that I do... love you

One Hundred Forty Three

I keep having this urge to tell you one hundred forty three. Although, I'm not sure. Well no, I know I'm sure. The feelings support it. The butterflies are always at play when my eyes meet yours,and your touch puts me at peace while keeping me aroused. I continue to soak up the words we spill in conversation.

I long to taste your lips and learn your kiss, and when we're together I always get close to letting my hands slip and fall to your waist, pulling you close and whispering, hello gorgeous. I'd even settle for a kiss on the cheek as we pull away from a long hug. But I know one day I'd purposely brush my cheek too far back and let my lips fall on yours, hoping that as my lips touch yours, you'll share in that longing and understand the satisfaction it brings. I just hope when our lips meet you'll feel what I do, and with your eyes closes see what I see in you.

I just hope that as I purposely miss your cheek and kiss your lips that you'll trust me enough to let go and let me fulfill your longing desires, and allow me to take you a few places that your imagination hadn't reached yet.

I just hope that as I purposely miss your cheek and kiss your lips that you know this isn't me chasing a lustful desire.

I just hope that as I purposely miss your cheek and kiss your lips that you really understand that I... one four three.

1-4-3

Equations and Languages

I wanted to see how far I could get without thinking about you, and I didn't make if out the door. It started last night. For the first time in a while I got to sit in my back seat and ride. i closed my eyes, listened to your voice and finally admitted to myself how I feel about you. I love not knowing where this is headed.

So as I got up this morning, the wind caressed my face and I inhaled the winter breeze, taking comfort on the open sea of life, knowing that you're the wind in my sails.

Stepping off the porch; my mobile rings. I didn't answer it though, didn't even remove it from my pocket. I knew it was you. And although this appears to be a blatant display of dismissal, it's not. I'm merely saving up future smiles in your bank to gain interest, so that I can collect my currency in joy the next time I see you.

I figure (smile x time)(hugs x kisses x experiences) / (openness x listening) = a lifetime of joy & possibilities.

So for now, in my pocket it'll stay...
(unfinished more soon)

Journey Through The South

The bass line jumps through the 808's, beats my seat and massages my back as I'm drowned in the crimson of the stoplight. That coupled with my seat leaned back 45 degrees puts me at ease and screams my level of coolness to those on the street who dare to peer in my direction.

"Do you know who I am?! Do you know where I'm from?! Don't kid yourself. Those streets that you're strolling down just to accomplish your daily routine... I ran them. Back in da day shawty, you wouldn't dare step on my curb for fear your knees would buckle and give way. But now... I'll let you have it.

You see I've traveled the world by GOD's grace: went to Rome and did as the Romans, discussed quadratic equations with the Incas, swam in Spanish kisses in the summer of '03 and drew a line parallel to the equator just to mark my spot. I've travled the world!

So as you sit next to me in your car practicing your Halloween faces, before you part your lips to make a sly comment, and before this light turns green, take a second to reevaluate the scene. That base line is massaging the shoulders that helped carry the stones of the Egyptian pyramids, and my seat is leaned back so far that you just catch a glimpse of my hat because I need privacy. I'm on GOD's couch telling HIM thank YOU for those blessings HE's given me today."

Welcome to the mother****ing south!

"When did I know?"

"When did I know you ask?"

He sits back in his chair and smiles as if to reminisce.

"It was somewhere between D' Angelo's 'When We Get By' and Common's 'Make My Day'. I looked up to glance at her. She was reading something and I saw her smile for the first time, again.

It got to me the day I read her eyes and wanted to own the letter between h and j and dot myself with her way of saying I; I am the one you wrote about in your poems, the one you daydream about eating ice cream with sitting under an over-sized umbrella at the beach.
I... was j-walking across the way she did her words and I didn't look both ways. Her verbs struck me, and it took me what seemed like a lifetime to recuperate and stop reciting I the way she wrote it. The language she spoke, I spoke it...

However, it wasn't until today that I knew. There was no second guessing. The feeling came as natural as GOD's blessing of breathing. I am absolutely, without a doubt in love with her. She satisfies every side of my personality. More and more each day I want to sample her flavor. One kiss would suffice. It would tell us all we needed to know. And I know she understands the art of kissing, the listening without a sound, the talking without a single word. I've longed for that... still do. At this point, all I know is that our vibe is my favorite song, and I play it every 3 minutes and 37 seconds of everyday.

So you ask, when did I know? I knew from the first time I heard her heels tapping against the floor as she walked pass. I knew when I first caught a whiff of her scent. I wanted to be wrapped in it and parade around for the next week... remembering her smile with each step.

What?! Nah, I can't do that. Tell her how I feel? Out of the question.. Why? Why you ask..."

He sits back in his chair again, biting his bottom lip. Finally he looks up.

"I haven't even told her hello."